1 twilight暮色-第58部分

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I　wasn't　so　lost　to　the　soreness　or　the　fog　of　medication　that　I　didn't　
respond　to　his　touch。　The　beeping　of　the　monitor　jumped　around　
erratically　—　now　he　wasn't　the　only　one　who　could　hear　my　heart　
misbehave。　

〃That's　going　to　be　embarrassing；〃　I　muttered　to　myself。　

He　chuckled；　and　a　speculative　look　came　into　his　eye。　〃Hmm；　I　wonder…〃　

He　leaned　in　slowly；　the　beeping　noise　accelerated　wildly　before　his　lips　
even　touched　me。　But　when　they　did；　though　with　the　most　gentle　of　
pressure；　the　beeping　stopped　altogether。　

He　pulled　back　abruptly；　his　anxious　expression　turning　to　relief　as　the　
monitor　reported　the　restarting　of　my　heart。　

〃It　seems　that　I'm　going　to　have　to　be　even　more　careful　with　you　than　
usual。〃　He　frowned。　

〃I　was　not　finished　kissing　you；〃　I　plained。　〃Don't　make　me　e　over　
there。〃　

He　grinned；　and　bent　to　press　his　lips　lightly　to　mine。　The　monitor　went　
wild。　

But　then　his　lips　were　taut。　He　pulled　away。　

〃I　think　I　hear　your　mother；〃　he　said；　grinning　again。　

〃Don't　leave　me；〃　I　cried；　an　irrational　surge　of　panic　flooding　through　
me。　I　couldn't　let　him　go　—　he　might　disappear　from　me　again。　

He　read　the　terror　in　my　eyes　for　a　short　second。　〃I　won't；〃　he　promised　
solemnly；　and　then　he　smiled。　〃I'll　take　a　nap。〃　

He　moved　from　the　hard　plastic　chair　by　my　side　to　the　turquoise　
fauxleather　recliner　at　the　foot　of　my　bed；　leaning　it　all　the　way　back；　
and　closing　his　eyes。　He　was　perfectly　still。　

〃Don't　forget　to　breathe；〃　I　whispered　sarcastically。　He　took　a　deep　
breath；　his　eyes　still　closed。　

I　could　hear　my　mother　now。　She　was　talking　to　someone；　maybe　a　nurse；　
and　she　sounded　tired　and　upset。　I　wanted　to　jump　out　of　the　bed　and　run　
to　her；　to　calm　her；　promise　that　everything　was　fine。　But　I　wasn't　in　
any　sort　of　shape　for　jumping；　so　I　waited　impatiently。　

The　door　opened　a　crack；　and　she　peeked　through。　

〃Mom！〃　I　whispered；　my　voice　full　of　love　and　relief。　

She　took　in　Edward's　still　form　on　the　recliner；　and　tiptoed　to　my　
bedside。　

〃He　never　leaves；　does　he？〃　she　mumbled　to　herself。　

〃Mom；　I'm　so　glad　to　see　you！〃　

She　bent　down　to　hug　me　gently；　and　I　felt　warm　tears　falling　on　my　
cheeks。　

〃Bella；　I　was　so　upset！〃　

〃I'm　sorry；　Mom。　But　everything's　fine　now；　it's　okay；〃　I　forted　her。　

〃I'm　just　glad　to　finally　see　your　eyes　open。〃　She　sat　on　the　edge　of　my　
bed。　

I　suddenly　realized　I　didn't　have　any　idea　when　it　was。　〃How　long　have　
they　been　closed？〃　

〃It's　Friday；　hon；　you've　been　out　for　a　while。〃　

〃Friday？〃　I　was　shocked。　I　tried　to　remember　what　day　it　had　been　when…　
but　I　didn't　want　to　think　about　that。　

〃They　had　to　keep　you　sedated　for　a　while；　honey　—　you've　got　a　lot　of　
injuries。〃　

〃I　know。〃　I　could　feel　them。　

〃You're　lucky　Dr。　Cullen　was　there。　He's　such　a　nice　man…　very　young；　
though。　And　he　looks　more　like　a　model　than　a　doctor…〃　

〃You　met　Carlisle？〃　

〃And　Edward's　sister　Alice。　She's　a　lovely　girl。〃　

〃She　is；〃　I　agreed　wholeheartedly。　

She　glanced　over　her　shoulder　at　Edward；　lying　with　his　eyes　closed　in　
the　chair。　〃You　didn't　tell　me　you　had　such　good　friends　in　Forks。〃　

I　cringed；　and　then　moaned。　

〃What　hurts？〃　she　demanded　anxiously；　turning　back　to　me。　Edward's　eyes　
flashed　to　my　face。　

〃It's　fine；〃　I　assured　them。　〃I　just　have　to　remember　not　to　move。〃　He　
lapsed　back　into　his　phony　slumber。　

I　took　advantage　of　my　mother's　momentary　distraction　to　keep　the　subject　
from　returning　to　my　lessthancandid　behavior。　〃Where's　Phil？〃　I　asked　
quickly。　

〃Florida　—　oh；　Bella！　You'll　never　guess！　Just　when　we　were　about　to　
leave；　the　best　news！〃　

〃Phil　got　signed？〃　I　guessed。　

〃Yes！　How　did　you　guess！　The　Suns；　can　you　believe　it？〃　

〃That's　great；　Mom；〃　I　said　as　enthusiastically　as　I　could　manage；　though　
I　had　little　idea　what　that　meant。　

〃And　you'll　like　Jacksonville　so　much；〃　she　gushed　while　I　stared　at　her　
vacantly。　〃I　was　a　little　bit　worried　when　Phil　started　talking　about　
Akron；　what　with　the　snow　and　everything；　because　you　know　how　I　hate　the　
cold；　but　now　Jacksonville！　It's　always　sunny；　and　the　humidity　really　
isn't　that　bad。　We　found　the　cutest　house；　yellow；　with　white　trim；　and　a　
porch　just　like　in　an　old　movie；　and　this　huge　oak　tree；　and　it's　just　a　
few　minutes　from　the　ocean；　and　you'll　have　your　own　bathroom　—〃　

〃Wait；　Mom！〃　I　interrupted。　Edward　still　had　his　eyes　closed；　but　he　
looked　too　tense　to　pass　as　asleep。　〃What　are　you　talking　about？　I'm　not　
going　to　Florida。　I　live　in　Forks。〃　

〃But　you　don't　have　to　anymore；　silly；〃　she　laughed。　〃Phil　will　be　able　
to　be　around　so　much　more　now…　we've　talked　about　it　a　lot；　and　what　I'm　
going　to　do　is　trade　off　on　the　away　games；　half　the　time　with　you；　half　
the　time　with　him。〃　

〃Mom。〃　I　hesitated；　wondering　how　best　to　be　diplomatic　about　this。　〃I　
want　to　live　in　Forks。　I'm　already　settled　in　at　school；　and　I　have　a　
couple　of　girlfriends〃　—　she　glanced　toward　Edward　again　when　I　reminded　
her　of　friends；　so　I　tried　another　direction　—　〃and　Charlie　needs　me。　
He's　just　all　alone　up　there；　and　he　can't　cook　at　all。〃　

〃You　want　to　stay　in　Forks？〃　she　asked；　bewildered。　The　idea　was　
inconceivable　to　her。　And　then　her　eyes　flickered　back　toward　Edward。　
〃Why？〃　

〃I　told　you　—　school；　Charlie　—　ouch！〃　I'd　shrugged。　Not　a　good　idea。　

Her　hands　fluttered　helplessly　over　me；　trying　to　find　a　safe　place　to　
pat。　She　made　do　with　my　forehead；　it　was　unbandaged。　

〃Bella；　honey；　you　hate　Forks；〃　she　reminded　me。　

〃It's　not　so　bad。〃　

She　frowned　and　looked　back　and　forth　between　Edward　and　me；　this　time　
very　deliberately。　

〃Is　it　this　boy？〃　she　whispered。　

I　opened　my　mouth　to　lie；　but　her　eyes　were　scrutinizing　my　face；　and　I　
knew　she　would　see　through　that。　

〃He's　part　of　it；〃　I　admitted。　No　need　to　confess　how　big　a　part。　〃So；　
have　you　had　a　chance　to　talk　with　Edward？〃　I　asked。　

〃Yes。〃　She　hesitated；　looking　at　his　perfectly　still　form。　〃And　I　want　to　
talk　to　you　about　that。〃　

Uhoh。　〃What　about？〃　I　asked。　

〃I　think　that　boy　is　in　love　with　you；〃　she　accused；　keeping　her　voice　
low。　

〃I　think　so；　too；〃　I　confided。　

〃And　how　do　you　feel　about　him？〃　She　only　poorly　concealed　the　raging　
curiosity　in　her　voice。　

I　sighed；　looking　away。　As　much　as　I　loved　my　mom；　this　was　not　a　
conversation　I　wanted　to　have　with　her。　〃I'm　pretty　crazy　about　him。〃　
There　—　that　sounded　like　something　a　teenager　with　her　first　boyfriend　
might　say。　

〃Well；　he　seems　very　nice；　and；　my　goodness；　he's　incredibly　
goodlooking；　but　you're　so　young；　Bella…〃　Her　voice　was　unsure；　as　far　
as　I　could　remember；　this　was　the　first　time　since　I　was　eight　that　she'd　
e　close　to　trying　to　sound　like　a　parental　authority。　I　recognized　the　
reasonablebutfirm　tone　of　voice　from　talks　I'd　had　with　her　about　men。　

〃I　know　that；　Mom。　Don't　worry　about　it。　It's　just　a　crush；〃　I　soothed　
her。　

〃That's　right；〃　she　agreed；　easily　pleased。　

Then　she　sighed　and　glanced　guiltily　over　her　shoulder　at　the　big；　round　
clock　on　the　wall。　

〃Do　you　need　to　go？〃　

She　bit　her　lip。　〃Phil's　supposed　to　call　in　a　little　while…　I　didn't　
know　you　were　going　to　wake　up…〃　

〃No　problem；　Mom。〃　I　tried　to　tone　down　the　relief　so　she　wouldn't　get　
her　feelings　hurt。　〃I　won't　be　alone。〃　

〃I'll　be　back　soon。　I've　been　sleeping　here；　you　know；〃　she　announced；　
proud　of　herself。　

〃Oh；　Mom；　you　don't　have　to　do　that！　You　can　sleep　at　home　—　I'll　never　
notice。〃　The　swirl　of　painkillers　in　my　brain　was　making　it　hard　to　
concentrate　even　now；　though；　apparently；　I'd　been　sleeping　for　days。　

〃I　was　too　nervous；〃　she　admitted　sheepishly。　〃There's　been　some　crime　in　
the　neighborhood；　and　I　don't　like　being　there　alone。〃　

〃Crime？〃　I　asked　in　alarm。　

〃Someone　broke　into　that　dance　studio　around　the　corner　from　the　house　
and　burned　it　to　the　ground　—　there's　nothing　left　at　all！　And　they　left　
a　stolen　car　right　out　front。　Do　you　remember　when　you　used　to　dance　
there；　honey？〃　

〃I　remember。〃　I　shivered；　and　winced。　

〃I　can　stay；　baby；　if　you　need　me。〃　

〃No；　Mom；　I'll　be　fine。　Edward　will　be　with　me。〃　

She　looked　like　that　might　be　why　she　wanted　to　stay。　〃I'll　be　back　
tonight。〃　It　sounded　as　much　like　a　warning　as　it　sounded　like　a　promise；　
and　she　glanced　at　Edward　again　as　she　said　it。　

〃I　love　you；　Mom。〃　

〃I　love　you；　too；　Bella。　Try　to　be　more　careful　when　you　walk；　honey；　I　
don't　want　to　lose　you。〃　

Edward's　eyes　stayed　closed；　but　a　wide　grin　flashed　across　his　face。　

A　nurse　came　bustling　in　then　to　check　all　my　tubes　and　wires。　My　mother　
kissed　my　forehead；　patted　my　gauzewrapped　hand；　and　left。　

The　nurse　was　checking　the　paper　readout　on　my　heart　monitor。　

〃Are　you　feeling　anxious；　honey？　Your　heart　rate　got　a　little　high　there。〃　

〃I'm　fine；〃　I　assured　her。　

〃I'll　tell　your　RN　that　you're　awake。　She'll　be　in　to　see　you　in　a　
minute。〃　

As　soon　as　she　closed　the　door；　Edward　was　at　my　side。　

〃You　stole　a　car？〃　I　raised　my　eyebrows。　

He　smiled；　unrepentant。　〃It　was　a　good　car；　very　fast。〃　

〃How　was　your　nap？〃　I　asked。　

〃Interesting。〃　His　eyes　narrowed。　

〃What？〃　

He　looked　down　while　he　answered。　〃I'm　surprised。　I　thought　Florida…　and　
your　mother…　well；　I　thought　that's　what　you　would　want。〃　

I　stared　at　him　unprehendingly。　〃But　you'd　be　stuck　inside　all　day　in　
Florida。　You'd　only　be　able　to　e　out　at　night；　just　like　a　real　
vampire。〃　

He　almost　smiled；　but　not　quite。　And　then　his　face　was　grave。　〃I　would　
stay　in　Forks；　Bella。　Or　somewhere　like　it；〃　he　explained。　〃Someplace　
where　I　couldn't　hurt　you　anymore。〃　

It　didn't　sink　in　at　first。　I　continued　to　stare　at　him　blankly　as　the　
words　one　by　one　clicked　into　place　in　my　head　like　a　ghastly　puzzle。　I　
was　barely　conscious　of　the　sound　of　my　heart　accelerating；　though；　as　my　
breathing　became　hyperventilation；　I　was　aware　of　the　sharp　aching　in　my　
protesting　ribs。　

He　didn't　say　anything；　he　watched　my　face　warily　as　the　pain　that　had　
nothing　to　do　with　broken　bones；　pain　that　was　infinitely　worse；　
threatened　to　crush　me。　

And　then　another　nurse　walked　purposefully　into　the　room。　Edward　sat　
still　as　stone　as　she　took　in　my　expression　with　a　practiced　eye　before　
turning　to　the　monitors。　

〃Time　for　more　pain　meds；　sweetheart？〃　she　asked　kindly；　tapping　the　IV　
feed。　

〃No；　no；〃　I　mumbled；　trying　to　keep　the　agony　out　of　my　voice。　〃I　don't　
need　anything。〃　I　couldn't　afford　to　close　my　eyes　now。　

〃No　need　to　be　brave；　honey。　It's　better　if　you　don't　get　too　stressed　
out；　you　need　to　rest。〃　She　waited；　but　I　just　shook　my　head。　

〃Okay；〃　she　sighed。　〃Hit　the　call　button　when　you're　ready。〃　

She　gave　Edward　a　stern　look；　and　threw　one　more　anxious　glance　at　the　
machinery；　before　leaving。　

His　cool　hands　were　on　my　face；　I　stared　at　him　with　wild　eyes。　

〃Shhh；　Bella；　calm　down。〃　

〃Don't　leave　me；〃　I　begged　in　a　broken　voice。　

〃I　won't；〃　he　promised。　〃Now　relax　before　I　call　the　nurse　back　to　sedate　
you。〃　

But　my　heart　couldn't　slow。　

〃Bella。〃　He　stroked　my　face　anxiously。　〃I'm　not　go